My heart is in Ethiopia: Part IV

Sorry for the roller coaster of blog posts but really -

do you think I would tell you the whole story -

in one lump sum? 

Come on - it's been months of roller coasters for us! 

(Tee! Hee!)

~~~

Bryan and I knew that even if we wanted to begin the
adoption process for Z

we would have to wait.
Our agencies policy for second adoptions is that we would have to wait

 3 months (122 days) until we meet with our social worker
for our 3 month post-adoption visit for Donovan and Elijah,
before we could even begin a home study for Z.

And that would all depend on how our new family is bonding.

And did Donovan and Elijah even like this other kiddo?

And then we would have to wait 6 months
to be officially matched with Z.

At 54 days of being home,

I received an email from an adoptive family.

They had a friend who had questions about our agencies waiting children,

and wondered if I would be willing to share with them what I knew about 

all three boys!

Of course!!! 

I would love to talk about these boys!

Anyone who knows me in RL(real life) knows that I love 

to talk about these boys!

Well, this family didn't want to hear anything about two of the boys,

just the one that we had already felt led to...

Z

My heart sank a little,
okay if we are being honest here -
my heart sank A LOT!
You see I'm selfish like that!

While I chatted on the phone with this nice momma,

who has a beautiful heart for the orphan,

and has been so touched by the photos that I was able to take 

of precious Z,
we were strangers who laughed, cried and found a new friendship
in each other through our love for this sweet boy.

Honestly I wanted to discourage this family from
adopting this boy,
not because she isn't awesome
but because that I wanted to bring him home,
and sometimes too often I think it's all about me.

Thankfully God took control of my tongue -
and I shared everything wonderful about this boy.

This sweet family fell in love with him too.
A few days later I received an email from them saying that they
were going to proceed with his adoption.
I was honestly sooooo happy for everyone!
I was happy Z -
he would finally have a family of his own!
A family who dearly loved him,
and this family would be so blessed to call this sweetie - "son".

But,
my evil self was also very sad.
I really thought he was to be our son!
I couldn't wait to begin paperwork for him!
I couldn't imagine life without him.
After a few days of pouting,
and praying,
I was able to be happy and at peace with God's plan.

O'course,
We then wondered, prayed, searched for what God wanted us to do.
What about the other two boys who wait
at the same orphanage...


But, we didn't feel that God is asking us to bring them home.

If this one boy isn't our son -
what does God want?
I know God isn't finished with us!